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“blood does not a fetus make!”

August 28, 2006

OK OK, very different from my superserious self-righteous posts, I know. But I felt the need to share this beautiful story.

The NYSun reported on August 25th:

A report that a fetus had been found at a Queens golf course triggered a multi-agency search for the mother yesterday — a search that ended when officials determined that the discovery was in fact a sanitary napkin.

Seriously, how in the world could a pad look like a fetus? Hello? Gothamist writes: “Chalk this one up to watching a little too much Law & Order: Special Victims Unit!” Totally. I love SVU, by the way.

Wait, wait, it gets better. Where was this mysterious “fetus” found? A garbage dump, perhaps? A deserted area?

The discovery was initially reported by a golfer who was suspicious of something she found in the restroom, a spokeswoman for the Parks Department said. “Everyone thought it was a fetus,” a course employee said.

So it was found in a bathroom, by a woman? You’re kidding, right? Priceless and also totally depressing.

Thanks to Gothamist for this nugget of news.

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4 comments

  1. it’s funny, the same thing happened in my bathroom last week. maybe it’s some kind of new pad they just put out on the market?


  2. are you *kidding* me?! this is the most insane thing i’ve heard in a while – weeks, maybe. hey man, i love SVU too, but mistaking a pad for a fetus? i don’t think that storyline would even go “full term” to full episodehood.


  3. J-you should stop hanging out at the golf course. See what it does to you? Next thing you know, tampons will be mistaken for bloody crosses. Or something.
    S-Completely insane, but would definitely make a fantastic parody episode of SVU. I’m imagining a very witty SNL skit.


  4. […] the story about the “fetus” that was found at a golf course in Queens (which later turned out to be a maxi pad)? This story trumps that one, I think. On many […]



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